The look of love

By John Galloway OMI

The response of most Catholics to Pope Paul VI’s 1968 encyclical Humanae vitae was probably that this simply is not a practical or a feasible teaching. Many priests and bishops similarly criticised it.

In more recent years many Catholics seem much more ready to recognise that the encyclical was a truly prophetic act of a pope recently described by Pope Benedict as “superhuman” in the way he guided the Church through the closing of Vatican II and the problems of his age.

The consequences predicted by Pope Paul in Humanae vitae are increasingly evident. He foresaw the danger of a general lowering of moral standards, and of a contraceptive mentality leading to a loss of respect for women. He was concerned that public authorities might even force the use of contraceptives on all people, since so many people already accept their use.

Obedience to Humanae vitae seemed simply impossible to Catholics of the period. To non-Catholics and non-Christians, the whole affair was just absurd. Now, with the perspective of time, it becomes clearer that obedience is indeed what was called for, in the face of an uncomprehending and sceptical world and an angry and rebellious Church. Paul VI was a true prophet, destined to face the rejection which is the fate of the prophet, the truth of whose words only emerges with time.

In the “modern” mind, obedience is opposed to spirit—the idea that to obey someone else seems destructive of myself. Perhaps this is because of the confusion of spirit and Spirit. That is, “my spirit” too easily becomes “Holy Spirit”. The truth, emphasised in the tradition of the Church, is that obedience is the only way to true freedom, rather than, as we fear, to slavery.

A recent Vatican document about obedience and authority in the religious life uses the Exodus as the paradigm or model of the freedom found through obedience. The journey through the desert involved paths which did not make sense. It was characterised by much rebellion on the part of God’s people. And yet the destiny to which God inexorably led them was “the beatifying intimacy of the heart of God”. “I bore you up on eagle wings and brought you here to myself” (Ex 19:4). God wills our liberation, not our imprisonment.

The reader of Humanae vitae will find plenty of evidence that what concerned Pope Paul was not obedience for the sake of discipline. “Whoever really loves his partner loves not only for what he receives, but loves that partner for her own sake, content to be able to enrich the other with the gift of himself” (9). He speaks of the faithful and exclusive love which is characteristic of marriage. He insists that this love is “creative of life”—that “it is not exhausted by the loving exchange of husband and wife, but it also contrives to go beyond this to bring new life into being… Children are the outstanding fruit of marriage, and contribute in the highest degree to the parents’ welfare” (9).

The encyclical uses language which in our time sounds “politically incorrect”, but which is as true now as it was then: “…they are not free to do as they like in the service of transmitting life, on the supposition that it is lawful for them to decide independently of other considerations what is the right course to follow. On the contrary, they are bound to ensure that what they do corresponds to the will of God the Creator” (10).

The defect of Humanae vitae may be its failure to speak in an appealing way to the average reasonably informed Catholic. No-one considered this to be possible for a papal document. Pope John Paul II appealed to people so well that he became known as a “Superstar”. He gave a series of talks on the “Gospel of the Body”, but they use elliptical language which make them difficult for the average reader. Fortunately, Christopher West has brought us the Theology of the Body of John Paul II in a readable form.
Pope John Paul teaches about sexuality and marriage in a way which is scriptural and relevant to our age. He clarifies and deepens the teaching of Paul VI. His reflections begin with the experience of the “original solitude” of the man in the Garden of Eden. Adam’s experience is in some way that of all persons. The animals were not suitable as helpmates for him. Only the woman could fill this gap. Through his experience of solitude, the man is prepared for communion with the woman, whose creation completes him. God’s intention was that the two should become “one flesh” in a sexual union not marked by lust.

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus says that even looking at a woman lustfully is already to commit adultery with her in one’s heart. This leads Pope John Paul to the reflection that the look with no lust—the loving, non-possessive and respectful “look”—is at the heart of a true marriage relationship. Such a “look” between man and wife is required if the Church’s ideal of marriage to be lived out. Living Humanae vitae can become a normal part of a loving relationship with one’s partner, and with Christ and his Church.
Pope John Paul also reflects deeply on marriage. He comments that throughout Scripture the relationship between God and people is said to be like a marriage relationship—God is married to his people. This is the “spousal analogy”, the climax of which is found in Ephesians 5, where God and the Church are described as being in a marriage relationship, so deepening our understanding of both.

God’s relationship with the Church is creative: God gives himself to the Church. The description of Ephesians 5 only makes sense if there is a sexual relationship between the marriage partners, one characterised by a genuine giving of self to the other. Also, just as God’s love for the Church is fruitful, so an essential aspect of the love between man and woman is that it should be fruitful. This ideal is difficult, seemingly impossible in the reality of some relationships. That does not mean the Church should reduce its teaching to a lowest common denominator which is reachable by all.

The Church, as does its Master, holds these ideals before us and calls us from where we are. Humanae vitae was always a “yes” to a true and creative love of marriage partners who are cooperators in the love of God for his Church. It was taken as a “no”, as a prohibition, by an excessively self-confident world and a Church which to a surprising extent shared in that over-confidence. We have perhaps grown more realistic about our world and the conditions for true development, and we may be more ready to accept Humanae vitae and its values.

Humility is necessary, a readiness to accept the limitations of our own perspectives, and to follow in obedience the teachings of the successor of Peter.

Fr Galloway is the Provincial of the Northern Province of SA of the Oblates of Mary Immaculate.