The art of brevity

The digital age has vastly improved global communication. For instance, grandparents in South Africa are able to talk at very little cost to their children and grandchildren all over the world and see them at the same time on Skype. But the by-product of all this wonderful high-technology is a chronic decline in the written word.

Indeed, people of all ages are able to communicate by e-mail and SMS as well as on Facebook and Twitter, but the immediacy of the medium has, in many cases, reduced languages to abbreviations and technospeak.

So much so that many people over the age of 50 can’t understand messages youngsters send each other these days when they use language such as “gr8 2 C u” and “#u2concertinjozi”.

On one hand, I suppose one has to keep up with the times and just accept that languages are prone to change and have to move on. On the other hand, I must admit that it irks me to see the Oxford English Dictionary adding the most extraordinary words to the English language every year—words that no-one had ever heard of only a few months before and that suddenly achieved global notoriety because some drug-crazed celebrity famous for nothing other than having rich parents decided to invent a new word for a feeling of well-being or re-defining the extreme, materialistic version of that basic pursuit of mankind called shopping.

It is at times like these that I have to remember that even the great William Shakespeare added dozens of words to the English language, and in his day there were probably people like me getting very steamed up about his new-fangled expressions.

Something else that seems to have disappeared is the art of brevity in writing. I must admit to being a culprit who cannot avoid going on and on about something. I am in awe of people who can write or say something in just a few words.

Such as this young fellow called Leroy who, in talking to his mother and in his letters to God was a model of brevity.

Little Leroy came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted.

“Mom, I want a bike for my birthday…”

Little Leroy was a bit of a delinquent, it must be said. He had regularly been in trouble at school and at home. So Leroy’s mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday. Little Leroy, of course, thought he did.

Leroy’s mother, being a Christian woman, wanted him to reflect on his behaviour over the past year and write a letter to God telling him why he deserved a bike for his birthday.

Little Leroy stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a letter.

Letter 1:

Dear God, I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday. I want a red one. Your friend, Leroy.

Leroy knew this wasn’t true. He had not been a very good boy this year, so he tore up the letter and started again.

Letter 2:

Dear God, This is your friend Leroy. I have been a pretty good boy this year, and I would like a red bike for my birthday. Thank you, Leroy.

Leroy knew this wasn’t true either. He tore up the letter and had another shot at it.

Letter 3:

Dear God, I have been an OK boy this year and I would really like a red bike for my birthday. Leroy.

Leroy knew he could not send this letter to God either.

Leroy was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mother he wanted to go to church. Leroy’s mother thought her plan had worked because Leroy looked very sad.

“Just be home in time for dinner,” she said.

Leroy walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. He looked around to see if anyone was there. He picked up a small statue of the Virgin Mary, slipped it under his shirt and ran out of the church, down the street, into his house and up to his room.

He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen.

Leroy began to write his letter to God.

Letter 4:

I’ve got your mother. If you want to see her again, send the bike. Signed: you know who.

Hopefully those of us who just can’t seem to manage short sentences, will learn something from young Leroy.

I have. Look! It’s easy. I think.