Why pre-marital sex is wrong

by Michael Shackleton · Published July 25, 2011 · Updated November 29, 2013

Young Catholics have little problem accepting that extra-marital sex is wrong because it is a violation of the permanent covenant made between husband, wife and God. But influenced by their peers, they are finding it hard to understand why pre-marital sex is condemned by the Church as immoral. Your comments?

Pre-marital sex, or sexual intercourse between two unmarried persons�usually referred to as fornication�can be casual with one or more partners, or in a more stable way when a couple live together for months or years. The latter is almost the norm in modern Western society, and the former is as old as society itself.

Commonplace these may be, but the Church has to uphold and teach the contrary because its teaching comes from Christ and his Apostles.

Christ considered fornication on the same level as adultery (Mk 7:21). Paul writes bluntly to the Corinthians: �Keep away from fornication…it is a sin against your own body� (1 Cor 6:18).

Paul frequently, such as in Romans 12:2, insists that Christians must not be conformed to the world but to Christ. This means they must take the practice of their faith seriously, and so personalise it that it becomes a matter of their own integrity, informing their conscience, giving them a moral awareness of what is right and what is wrong.

Many Catholics are reluctant to condemn pre-marital sex when it is commonly accepted. In this atmosphere of tolerance, they feel no obligation to follow the Church�s intolerant stance.

It is not easy to penetrate today�s resistant wall of indifference to the teaching that sex within lawful marriage is the only moral way. A thorough grasp of how the Church understands marriage as God�s will for the well-being of humanity must be the basis for any discussion on sex before or outside of marriage.

Scripture gives us guidance, in particular in 1 Cor 6:12-20, but also in Genesis 2:18-25, Matthew 19:3-6 and Ephesians 5:21-33.

Any indifference or tolerance in respect of pre-marital sex is not the way to have a clear conscience on the matter. Through the author of Revelation, Christ tells the church of Laodicea: �You are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were one or the other, but since you are neither, but only lukewarm, I will spit you out of my mouth� (Rev 3:15-16).

We can gather, then, that he will not tolerate those who accept his teaching half-heartedly.