Being channels of peace

Like any of those fortunate enough to own a swimming pool that needs to be put into order at the beginning of summer, I have been working on my pool.

My trees drop their leaves not in autumn but in spring and in addition produce all kinds of catkins in amazing profusion. So I stood for some minutes watching the debris that the wind had tumbled into the pool being channelled along through the filtering process and disappearing down the leaftrap.

As I stood in contemplation I was reminded of the times when over the years my husband and kids would play at making tiny boats of sticks or leaves to be carried down any stream of running water. Most people can relate in some way to watching flowing water carrying whatever it comes across in its path. There are times when this causes enormous destruction, but also fun times of river rafting or times of being gently channelled along.

So as I reflected on our October theme, “Instruments of Peace”—or channels of peace as we sing in the hymn—I wondered whatever happened to the Peace Prayer for South Africa that we used to say. We have just celebrated the feast of St Francis and I used the prayer as the basis for the family theme, Instruments of Peace, for October, which is also Mission month.

“What a mission!”  You might hear young people say when asked to do anything, including living in peace at home. “But he started it.” “He always starts.” “No, I didn’t.” “Yes you did.”

In couple relationships too, isn’t there usually one who generally makes peace first? Being a peace maker is more than being a peace-keeper. It’s more active, takes a decision to love, to be willing to forgive or ask forgiveness.

But underneath it all there is a movement, call it a channelling movement. It is not just our own mission, our own families, or our own world that is seeking peaceful solutions to the enormous crises facing us. It is God’s world, God’s family that is being evangelised by missionaries of all kinds, including us, ourselves. It is the Good News of God’s love that is being passed on and could we not say that the love is the channel.

When we pray the “Prayer of St Francis”, as all families are being invited to do during the month of October, could we not think a deeper meaning into the words, a meaning no doubt that Francis himself would apply.  “Where there is hatred let me sow love, injury pardon, despair hope and darkness light.” A tall order, as is this:  “Grant that I may not so much seek to be understood as to understand, to be loved as to love, to receive sympathy as to give it.”

Most difficult and complicated for me in the adapted version used for the Prayer for South Africa are the final words: “In forgetting ourselves we shall find unending peace with others.” Easier said than done!

Admittedly unconditional love as shown to us by Jesus is self-emptying and does go beyond seeking fulfilment of one’s own needs, but modern psychology tells us we need to have our needs met to become well-functioning people.

Family life is a school for life. It is where we should learn to understand ourselves and the needs we experience, to share them in open personal communication, to be listened to and heard and accepted.

At the same time, we do learn that as we grow up no one except ourselves is ultimately responsible for meeting our needs. Add to that how well we know how much hurt and trauma is experienced constantly in the intimate relationships that should be the epitome of peace.

A beautiful definition is “Peace is the tranquillity of order.” We, as a society and as Church and families who are called to be models for society, have a very long way to go, ideally beginning at home, to be active participants in God’s mission, to be instruments and channels of his peace.