Love Yourself, the way God Loves You
Recently I sat down with a young woman who had given up on life. She had given up on herself. She had lost all confidence in her own abilities and did not believe that her life would ever get back together again.
Low self-esteem can harm ones relationships – especially with God. In her column, Judith Turner gives five tips on how to love ones self. (Photo: morguefile)
The young woman could not see herself getting anything right about her life. She hated it. She hated herself. Where did it all begin?
Sometimes we do neglect ourselves. We neglect ourselves to the point where we do not know ourselves, understand ourselves and ultimately love ourselves. This leads to low self-confidence and low self-esteem.
We know that we have to love ourselves first before we can engage in any meaningful relationships with others. But many of us do not know where to start with loving ourselves.
For that reason I have compiled a list on how to love yourself, in the hope that it might help people who are facing difficulty knowing what to do in boosting their self-esteem.
In our young days we look for relationships with others. We spend time on looking for the right person. We spend a lot of time on looking for the best spouse or romantic partner and we look forward to having a good relationship with him or her.
And when we do find the right person we can either live happily ever after or we can fail miserably. The latter might be influenced by a deficiency in self-love.
Learning to love yourself starts with making a conscious decision, an intention to become happy and to lead a fulfilled life. When you do not love yourself and suffer from low self-esteem, it is almost impossible to ever reach the potential that you suspect you have.
When you make a decision to love yourself, you are really saying that you want to come alive. You want to connect with that deep spirit of love within yourself and you want it to shine radiantly towards others.
So if youve decided on loving yourself but are stumped on how to do it, there are five ways which will be helpful:
Fall in love with yourself. Think about what makes you you. Just like a flower that needs watering to grow, learn to nurture yourself in every way. Love yourself for all the good that you see and accept your flaws and the fact that you are imperfect.
This does not mean that you do not learn to change your shortcomings; instead, you are being gentle and kind to yourself despite all your flaws.
Look in the mirror and fall in love with the reflection that is you.
Eliminate undue self-criticism. Do you often berate yourself over the tiniest thing? Is there a little voice inside your head that often tells you that you are no good or not as good as others? If you find that you criticise yourself often, make an effort to stop the self-criticism.
Be kind and positive. When you start to think kindly and positively about yourself, the love you have for yourself just grows.
Make it a habit to praise yourself everyday, while in the front of the mirror. Because of such thoughts, you naturally undertake empowering actions that support your development.
Acknowledge your effort. Its not always about winning or having success in everything that you do. Many times, it is the effort that counts! Acknowledge that youve done your best, even if you have failed to produce tangible results.
Let go of worry. Loving yourself requires you to let go of your worry. It is horrible to live a life filled with constant worrying (though people with an anxiety disorder might need therapeutic help). Worry does not help in any way. It cannot, on its own, make things happen. Trust, prayer and wise actions can.
This is the way in which God loves us.
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