Why I am a Brother

By Br Simeon Banda FSM

One day last year I was doing my reflection on the very top of our tank. It was soon after I had turned 50 years old.

I had received messages from diverse friends. The question that fascinated me most was: “Who is a brother today?” Or if I had to ask, like our Lord: “What do people say we are today?” In my context we call a brother “Mchimwene”. The term denotes closer relationships among the members of the blood family.

In my culture, where extended family carries weight, I may have as many achimwenes as possible, depending on kith and kin. If I am well to do, all the less fortunate members of the clan would be frequenting my home empty-handed but would return to their homes with something small in their hands.

Sometimes achimwenes would come with borrowed money if I happened to be far away from them, and would expect me to pay the debt and provide a return ticket. Some might call this parasitism, which turns others into perpetual infants to be fed even when they are adults with their families. Being a mean mchimwmene while you have the means meant that you were practising witchcraft and by sharing your wealth with the less fortunate, you would lose it all. People would say, “chuma chokhwimira”, which means wealth acquired in an evil way. Such people isolate themselves from the rest of the clan members and nobody visits them. They become the clan’s social isolates.

When I was young, solidarity in my culture was very strong and interdependence the norm. Individual wealth had no place among my people and the gap between the poor and the rich was minimal. Achimwenes relied on one another even in farming, times of famine, sickness, weddings, and death. Orphans were easily integrated into the family. We had no orphanages. Elders were taken care of by the young adults.

Today old age is attributed to witchcraft and the elderly are not well respected. When people die, they become subject to suspicion. What a pity!

l grew up with my aunt and I called her children my brothers and sisters. They supported me during my school years both at primary and secondary school levels because my biological parents were financially handicapped. I felt at home with these brothers and sisters of mine. Some learned only later that I was an adopted son.

Of late, I have discovered that these relationships are not the same. Individualism is very quickly gaining ground, and everyone seems to mind his or her own business with the spouse and children. Hospitality, which used to be the norm, has now gone. We have lost a treasure and from what I can see, it is irreversible.

However, I see the small Christian communities taking over the lost concept of solidarity. Anyone affiliated to a faith community finds brothers and sisters. Although they do not do much, the little generosity shown when one is in trouble is very attractive.

Now coming back to my question, I note that St Marcellin Champagnat, the founder of my congregation, invited us to have a blood brother kind of relationship. He wanted us to brother the destitute youth.

Yes, the blood of Jesus is more than sibling relationships. It embraces all who reveal the image of God. To be a brother for me is to enter into relationships that embrace all, especially the less fortunate youth. I liken the Church to a family where people live as brothers and sisters, where the less fortunate can also feel at home.

But many people think that being a religious brother means that one is not intelligent enough to be a priest. I question the intelligence they are talking about. Vocations in our Church are not competitions but complementary functions or ministries. St Paul talks of charisms for the good of the church.

Brother Seán Sammon, the Marist Brothers’ superior-general, talks of a brother as someone who shows what the Church ought to be. He says it is like Peter and John going to the tomb. The hierarchy syndrome, which the pyramid model of the Church created, created a small confusion which will take us long to eradicate. In our Church there are no inferior and superior vocations, only complementary ones.

We religious are like shock therapy. Any time the Church forgets its role, the Spirit sends individuals to remind us what the Church ought to be.

I would compare the role of the religious brother to the judges in the Old Testament. They appeared at times of a crisis. Or maybe brothers are like the prophets who had to denounce any form of syncretism in Israel.

Our role is to join hands in removing ignorance which divides people. It makes us turn long-term enemies into brothers. We see diversity and pluralism as a blessing and not as a curse. This opens us to serve anywhere and to feel at home with everyone. Favourites and preferences do not exist.

It is this life of love that we can share with a divided world. It is this life of love that lets us witness ethnic diversity as a blessing which we should respect. Isn’t it what Jesus said: that whatever we do to any of our brothers, we do it to him?

When we live in harmony because of our faith and despite being different in many ways, we witness to another culture that which is already a reality among us. It is this alternative way of life that the Church and the world badly needs today. This will make the dream of St Marcellin come true: “See how they love one another.”

Let us appreciate one another’s vocation and build the church of equals with different roles to play for the good of all.

Br Simeon Banda is a Marist Brother Malawian based in Matola, Mozambique.